Taking Control, Part
Four
If You Try to Control People or
Things Outside Your Sphere of Operation,
You Fail
"However, control in itself is not an entire answer to everything, for if
it were one would have to be able to control everything, not only in his own
job, but in an office or on earth, before he could be happy. We discover in
examining control that the limits of control should be extended only across
one's actual sphere of operation. When an individual attempts to extend control
far beyond his active interest in a job or in life he encounters difficulty."
"Thus there is obviously another factor involved than control. This factor is
willingness not to control and is fully as important as control itself." --
L. Ron Hubbard from The Problems of Work
Parents, bosses, spouses, colleagues or co-workers sometimes try to control you
beyond their sphere of operation. For example, when parents try to control your
beliefs, your career choices or your marriage, you might feel upset.
When the manager of Department A tries to control employees in Department B,
problems come up. As long as he sticks to controlling his sphere of operation,
which is Department A, all is well.
You may have felt overwhelmed in the past when you tried to control something
that was not part of your sphere of operation. If it is not your responsibility,
why bother?
For example, a business owner was overwhelmed and stressed out. His consultant,
who uses L. Ron Hubbard's material, had him list all the things he was concerned
about.
● Business income was down
● The roof was leaking in the office building
● His son was having problems at college in another state
● His community club meetings were irregular
● His quarterly taxes were late
The client was trying to fix all of these problems, but without success.
The consultant pointed out only the first problem was in his sphere of
operation. His income was low because he was not spending much time working. All
the other problems were outside his zone.
The landlord had scheduled a roofer.
The son was twenty years old and now on his own.
While the client was the former president of his community club, he no longer
was in charge. He was just a member.
The accountant was negotiating a deal with the Internal Revenue Service and
didn't feel the client needed to pay the overdue tax.
While it would be wonderful if the client could control all of these problems,
he needed to change his mind and let others control them.
As soon as he realized this, he relaxed. He focused on his income and soon
solved the first problem.
The landlord installed the new roof.
He started to treat his son as an adult who could take care of himself. His son
realized he was responsible for his own success, good or bad, and started doing
better in college.
He quit the club, to his great relief.
His accountant eventually solved the IRS problem.
Sometimes people try to make you control things outside your zone of operation.
You must refuse.
For example, someone asks you for a loan to pay his bills. You say, "While I'm
sorry you can't pay your bills, I'm not going to pay them for you. You need to
solve this yourself."
Your sister sees your grandson watching television during a family gathering and
tells you to go turn off the TV. You say, "I agree my grandson shouldn't watch
so much TV, but he's my daughter's son, not mine."
Your boss asks you to go fix the sales problem with another department. You say,
"Even though I'm the domestic sales manager, I'll be happy to fix the
international sales department . . . if you promote me to Vice President of
Worldwide Sales."
Recommendations
1. Make a list of areas in your life that are difficult for you to control.
2. Make another list of things that bother you.
3. Circle items on both list that are outside your sphere of operation.
4. Decide if you are willing to not try to control them.
5. Stop trying to control them. Instead, work on the things you can control on
your two lists above.
For example, a coworker slurps his coffee each morning. It drives you crazy! You
drop hints and make jokes, but he still slurps away. The stress is unbearable.
You realize the coworker's noise is outside your sphere of operation and stop
all efforts to make him stop slurping. You focus on your job instead. You soon
realize don't care about the slurping noise any longer. No more stress!
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